‘No more dinnerlady names left’

The Met Office have announced plans to move away from the recent trend of naming storms after dinner ladies and lollipop ladies and are in future opting for more dramatic names.

A Met Office spokesman said that future storm names will incorporate the names of war criminals, mass-murderers , diseases and random phrases like ‘wolfbastard’ and ‘oozing discharge’.

“We need to spice things up a bit” he explained. “It’s also alphabetical, so it’ll be a while until we’re getting whipped by ‘StalinTrumpAIDSbitch’.